Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
I wear drunk well.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
