I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
