Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Randomize
