Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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