I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
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She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
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I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
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