my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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