all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Randomize
