you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
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