Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Hippo gnu deer
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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