he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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