My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize