yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize