He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
