It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
