So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
The adults are the big ones right?
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
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