I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
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