Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
Randomize
