Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Randomize
