Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize