I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
