Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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