dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
then he tried to convert me to islam
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Randomize
