of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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