i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Randomize
