I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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