I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
