thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
