: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Randomize
