i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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