community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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