Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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