I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
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