So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
