dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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