so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize
