i wish starbucks made bloody marys
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
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