Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
