I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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