Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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