dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Randomize