It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
