Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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