im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
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This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
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I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck