i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
