so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Randomize
