i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
