I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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