How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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