I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
