I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
